Even though I am Somali I don’t know much about the history of the wedding culture how it has changed over the years. Before covid hit, I remember going to at least 4 weddings a year. Some might find this to be a crazy amount but for a Somali girl and especially in my family that’s not a lot. I have a very large family, seriously it's ridiculous. Let me put it this way both my mother and father have 10+ siblings each and their children have now had children. I’m also part of a large tribe so someone is always getting married. Even though I’ve been to many Somali weddings I don’t know what steps the bride and groom must go through and what rules and customs they have to follow. While I was doing the research for this article I was able to sit down and talk to the women in my family and ask about our history and what traditions do we follow and what has changed over the years.
To give you some background information Somalia is located on the east coast of Africa. The country is nicknamed the horn of Africa due to the land being in the shape of a horn. Somali culture in itself is a combination of different cultures due to Somalia having close ties with the Arab world and being colonised by Europe.
The wedding or the marriage in Somali culture is very important. The union between the bride and group symbolises the joining of two families or two clans. Marriages can either be arranged or be a result of personal choice but traditionally in the past there were more marriages that were arranged. At the end of the day, the choice to marry would always be the women’s choice.
There are four main components to a traditional Somali wedding. First, we have the “Dooris “which is the proposal. In this stage, the male goes to the female’s family to ask her father's hand in marriage. He would also bring with him gifts such as jewellery. This is not part of the dowry.
Next, we have the “Nikah “which is the engagement, giving away ceremony. The nikah is where the religious part of the wedding takes place. Islam is the dominant religion in Somalia, so at the wedding, they do the Islamic ceremony. The ceremony is led by a “sheikh” which is a religious leader, and the only people present along with the leader are the bride, groom and their immediate family. This ceremony can be performed at the house or masjid. This is also when the bride and groom officially get married. Although traditions vary, the ceremony may include blessings and readings from the Quran, a verbal acceptance by the bride and groom of the marriage contract, and an exchange of rings.
Now is when we have the “Aroos” which is what most would call the reception. This is when guests get served food and drink. It is also where traditional dancing would occur such as Buraanbur. Buraanbur is a poetic form within traditional Somali poetry that’s been composed by women. The poetry contains lyrics that praise the bride and groom and their family along with blessings in their union.
What we have now is what we call the “shaash saar”. This is a traditional ceremony that occurs seven days after the wedding. During those 7 days is where the bride and the groom bond and have a honeymoon and during this time they don’t leave the house. On the seventh day is when the bride wears her traditional dress known as a “Guntiino” and sits in a chair surrounded by the females of her family. The married women of the family put a “shaash” on the bride’s head. This is to welcome the bride into her married life.
Wedding Attire
Men
- Macawis - Somali men wear sarong-like clothing (a long piece of cloth wrapped around the waist). Usually, it is a white cotton piece, but it can also be colourful.
- Khameez- This is an ankle-length dress, usually with long sleeves.
- Turban
- Koofiyad – This a cotton embroidered cap
- Western style suit
Women
- Dirac - A flowing, lightweight dress usually worn over a slip or petticoats.
- Hijab - Head scarf that covers hair
- Masar - Simple headwrap
- Jilbab - A long garment that cloaks the entire body. From head to toe
- Guuntino - A full-length, brightly coloured dress resembling a Sari that’s tied at the waist and shoulder.
- Western-style dress
The “Dirac” is a loose style dress that became widely popular in the 70s and is now widely worn by all Somali ladies. The Dirac worn by the bride is different from the normal Dirac. It has a train and is heavily embellished with gold. The normal “dirac” comes in various designs and patterns. It is however more common to see the brides wearing a modern white dress at the wedding and wear the traditional clothing at the nikah ceremony. you do have hybrid dresses that are steadily becoming more popular. It's in the shape of a white dress but with the guntino pattern.
The traditional dress has changed very little over the centuries. ‘Gareys’ or its more modern names ‘Guntino’ is one of the traditional dresses that women wear, specifically the bride wears at the wedding. It is several yards of cloth that is knotted on one shoulder and that has been wrapped around the chest and waist. The Guuntino is worn with traditional beads called “cunaabi” or they wear a “xirsi” (Hirsi). “Guntino” has changed now, before they were made from polyester or cotton but the trend now is to wear one made from silk that has the same pattern as a shaash.
Many things have changed over the years. For example,
the seven days, stay in honeymoon phase, might be impossible to do if the bride
and groom have work commitments. This means that the brides “shaash saar” won’t
happen on the eighth day. Usually, this now happens on the day of the wedding at
the reception. In the past the wedding would also happen over a period of three
days, however, due to limited spaces at venues and the limited amount of money they
are willing to spend the wedding would happen all in one day.
Regarding the attire, almost all brides nowadays
wear a western-style wedding dress for the whole wedding. Or they will wear the
traditional dress at the nikah and wear the white dress at the reception. For
the groom what he wears depends on the brides choice, if she is wearing traditional
clothes and he would do the same if she’s wearing a white dress he would then
wear a suit and tie. When it comes to the attire it honestly depends on what
the bride wants.
By Sahra Elmi
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